Insider's Tips: Tip #3 - Cut Down Music
Feel free to cut down your music.
This whole blog is more about personal opinion and experience from what we see at weddings. My wedding planner friends might cringe at some of my suggestions as they might not be proper, but this is supposed to be insider tips.
Many brides choose to have a unity candle during their ceremony. When it comes to the lighting of the unity candle, a beautiful song is played or sung during this time. Unfortanately, the song is sometimes 5 times the length of time that it takes you to walk over and light the candle. It is just awkward. You stand there for 3 minutes looking at each other wondering what you are supposed to be doing. Maybe you are supposed to be doing something - I really don't know - do you walk back up to the front by the minister, do you stand there and looking lovingly into each other's eyes?
For a formal ceremony, there might not be anything you can do about this. (Ask the wedding planner). It is not like you can ask the soloist to shorten The Lord's Prayer that she is singing! But the string musicians might be able to play a shortened version of their song. I don't know, just a thought.
The problem occurs more with the casual outdoor ceremony. I don't know if it is because there is typically a smaller space to walk, thus taking less time or if the casual setting makes it seem like you stand there forever. If you have a song that you are going to ask the venue or the DJ to play during the lighting of the unity candle, consider shortening the song prior to the wedding. If done correctly, most guests won't even notice that the middle of the song was taken out. (Your videographer can also provide this song-shortening service - we often do it in the course of editing...) I guess you also could get the DJ to just fade the song after you light the candle and are back at the minister.
The same philosophy can be applied to the first dances. Do you hate being the center of attention? What about the groom? Maybe your parents might have difficulty dancing due to age or illness. You want to celebrate with the traditional dances, but maybe it might be easier on them if it was to a shorter song.
I am sure that a professional DJ will see that you are struggling and shorten it automatically or it could even be covered in your 1st meeting with them, but if it isn't, please know that it is ok and maybe appreciated.