Insider's Tips: Tip #35 - A Mother's Day Tribute

Since it is the week of Mother's Day, here is a tip regarding children at weddings.  Oooohhhhh, controversial.  It is not that bad, keep reading.  

 

I love kids, we even have one ourselves, so this is not about me not liking kids.  And it is not about me not liking them in weddings.  John and I had four of them in our wedding 11 years ago (3 ring bearers + 3 pillows (weapons) = 1 pillow fight during the ceremony).  It is about preparation.  

 

When you first get engaged and you are picking out your wedding party, a lot of times you will have beautiful nieces and nephews that you want to be included.  Sometimes they are a bit young, but even if they cry all the way down the aisle, they still are cute.  And you have to include them.  Completely understandable! But we need to make a plan for their day.  

 

We all know a wedding day is a long day.  Sometimes the wedding party is arriving at the church 5 or 6 hours before the ceremony time for getting ready and pictures and things.  It is necessary for this extra time as there is so much to be done before the ceremony starts.  But it is so hard on the kids and their moms.  Especially if mom and dad are both in the wedding party.  What about if the go-to grandparent is your parent too and is in the wedding party.  There is no one that can deal with the kids.  Can you imagine your mom, in her beautiful dress that is not meant to be bending down and picking up kids, trying to bend down and soothe her grandbaby... It is stressful.  And it is your wedding day, you don't want anymore stress!

 

That is what this really is about - the stress level and how it can be helped.  This is not about not having kids in the wedding (I want to make sure that you understand my point here).  It is about preparation.  

 

One of our all-time favorite families, the Remmerts, have had two kids get married in two years plus they had three more already married with kids.  A lot of going forth and multiplying in this family!  Ha!  On Molly Remmert's wedding day last December, she and her siblings were prepared.  They knew with that many kids in for a long day, without the routine of naps, that it was going to be a stressful day for the kids, parents, and grandparents, and maybe even the bride.  So they thought ahead and were prepared with 4 babysitters for the day.  

 

The babysitters arrived at the church with Happy Meals for all of the kids (because remember the finger foods you and your bridesmaids might be enjoying, might not appeal to the little ones).  And if the poor kids can't have a nap on such a long day, can't they at least have something to eat that they like???  These babysitters were also playmates that didn't have to worry about getting dressed with makeup on to take lots of photos!!  Being a long Catholic ceremony, the kids didn't even stand up at the front the entire time.  This is a trend we see a lot of and it makes sense.  Let them walk down the aisle and go sit down.  It is the best of both worlds.  

 

I don't even know if they stayed the entire ceremony.  I know that the kids weren't at the reception for the entire time, but they made an appearance, as partying until 11:00 p.m. is not something that most little ones can do.  (I know of one Matron of Honor that had to hold her asleep little 4 year old ring bearer for most of the reception because she was having fun at her sister's wedding and didn't want to leave) Thank goodness for the babysitters!!  It allowed for a stress free day for everyone.  It is about preparation.

Thanks for the cute photo, Stacy Richardson Photography!  

 

Comments

[Gretchen Birdwell]

Angela, these are great tips! I'll have to remember to mention babysitters when I'm meeting with my brides!